Conflict Is Not Abuse Doc é 299 pages

Book Conflict Is Not Abuse

Conflict Is Not Abuse Doc é 299 pages Ñ [EPUB] ✰ Conflict Is Not Abuse Author Sarah Schulman – From intimate relationships to global politics Sarah Schulman observes a continuum that inflated accusations of harm are used to avoid accountability Illuminating the difference between Conflict and A From intimaBuse is a searing rejection of the cultural phenomenon of blame cruelty and scapegoating and how those in positions of power exacerbate and manipulate fear of the other to achieve their goalsSarah Schulman is a novelist nonfiction writer playwright screenwriter journalist and AIDS historian and the author of eighteen books A Guggenheim and Fulbright Fellow Sarah is a Distinguished Professor of the Humanities at the City University of New York College of Staten Island Her novels published by Arsenal include Rat Bohemia Empathy After Delores and The Mere Future She lives in New York I started out being really into this book feeling personally challenged by it and writing down some uotes like Refusing to be self critical in order to solve conflicts enhances the power of the state I found it valuable to look at how both Supremacy and Trauma can lead to unhealthy responses to conflict However the I read the I felt like this book was Sarah Schulman intellectualizing her obsession with past rejections Like the title of the book includes the duty of repair but I never felt like she made the case for why it's our duty I definitely agree that it's unhealthy to label someone abusivethreatening and then call the police on them or ask everyone you know in common to start shunning them But we have limited time and to me it feels like an unreasonable expectation that every person who crosses your path should process conflict with you Like sometimes a relationship just isn't worth maintaining and I don't think that's a violence It's definitely a book that should be read in the spirit of self criticism rather than externally focused criticism I found myself drifting into the latter at times but realized that's what was irritating me about Schulman's stance most of her criticisms were of how other people treated her rather than how she was behaving It was worth reading for me and I'd love to discuss it with people It helped me articulate and draw connections between certain phenomena in my world

Kindle Æ Conflict Is Not Abuse á Sarah Schulman

Racial and national groups bond through the refusal to change their self concept She illustrates how Supremacy behavior and Traumatized behavior resemble each other through a shared inability to tolerate differenceThis important and sure to be controversial book illuminates such contemporary and historical issues of personal racial and geo political difference as tools of escalation towards injustice exclusion and punishment whether the objects of dehumanization are other individuals in our families or communities people with HIV African Americans or Palestinians Conflict Is Not A I wish I had checked the author considering how much I hated Gentrification of the Mind The premise of this book is solid individuals and groups often overreact to perceived or minimal danger and claim abuse andor accuse others of abuse when the situation is nuanced and reciprocal than thatThe problem with the way that the argument is presented is that it gives a very broad overview invoking governmental power and the IsraeliPalestinian conflict while relying on personal examples from Schulman's acuaintance group I don't come from the same background as Schulman so a lot of the anecdotes that were meant to represent universal societal trends didn't ring true to me I'm not saying that those things didn't happen but that Schulman has a very specific context and doesn't try to analyze other contextsSchulman always ends up looking noble in these examples in a way that I kind of distrust Wait I should amend that to say that there are times when she's discussing people who have rejected her romantic advances where I wanted to shout Just let it go She's just not that into you Maybe it's because I'm a youngster who's been through online dating but I don't think anyone owes you an extensive explanation never mind friendship if they don't want to date you On that same thought no one owes transitional affection to someone they've already broken up with no matter how sudden the splitI will say that one of the good points of this book is the thought provoking chapter on HIV criminalization but really I wish I had read about this from a different author with thorough analysis But mostly this book got me to do a lot of cleaning so I wouldn't have to read this book

Sarah Schulman á Conflict Is Not Abuse Kindle

Conflict Is Not AbuseFrom intimate relationships to global politics Sarah Schulman observes a continuum that inflated accusations of harm are used to avoid accountability Illuminating the difference between Conflict and Abuse Schulman directly addresses our contemporary culture of scapegoating This deep brave and bold work reveals how punishment replaces personal and collective self criticism and shows why difference is so often used to justify cruelty and shunning Rooting the problem of escalation in negative group relationships Schulman illuminates the ways cliues communities families and religious Sarah Schulman says this in the introduction but in order to get anything out of this book I feel I must stress it This is not a book that is to be treated as right or wrongI say this mostly because I'm afraid many will read some of the disagreeable notions and dismiss the whole project I personally found many ideas within the book wrong and others spot on right and a lot that I would have worded differently to accommodate readers' feminist code of ethics andor political correctness which I wager much of her readership is feminist andor politically awaresensitive What I want to tell my friends to do is read the Intro Chapters 3 5 6 and the conclusion first Chapters 4 7 and 8 next And then if you must Chapter 1 and 2 I read the book in order but half way through chapter 2 I was dismayed There were too many offensive turn offs to struggle through Or too many examples of conflict that were petty and hard to take seriously I also disagreed with some of her premises like her assertion that there is a cut and dry distinction between conflict and abuse or that refusing communication with someone you're in conflict with is by matter of fact cruel and childishBut as I settled myself into the book I became much compelled by a lot of what she was saying and let my critical self go a little easier on her The truth is she hits the nail on the head over and over again in illuminating the trend of those in conflict escalating the situation to avoid facing the whole truth of the matter particularly if the whole truth reuires self reflection Perhaps her most controversial point in the book was the one that resonated the most with me The people who are most likely to overstate harm are those who are triggered and reminded of past abuse or those who stand to lose certain social or political privileges The tactics used to escalate conflicts and avoid accountability are strikingly similar between a person suffering from untreated or unprocessed PTSD and someone from a privileged position supremacist behavior is what she calls it What's going on internally is totally different of course but externally both are known to overreact to a conflict refuse any knowledge that may threaten their version of what has happened and portray themselves as a victim and the person or people they're in conflict with as an abuser The supremacist does this to maintain power and privilege The traumatized does this because they're stuck in a past nightmare In both cases though Schulman advocates for community intervention that seeks truth and reconciliation And she also cautions against socially dysfunctional groups be they family friends nation cliue who unuestioningly support the person overstating harm and join in and escalate conflict This book is problematic It also is what I've been waiting a long time for I really want my friends to read it so we can talk about it together and tease out some of the weird parts and expand on the ideas that do put words to things we've experienced or done Really it's just a relief to hear a firm argument for conflict resolution For years I've felt so frustrated that the culture in my political community of how to handle conflict is to either stick your fingers in your ears and ignore it or to humiliate or banish someone Even though I think these responses are sometimes warranted I think they've become our only go to's Why does it seem so off the table to consider righting wrongs in a way that doesn't involve shunning that might include reconciliation? For those of you in the Bay I heard she's speaking at Alley Cat books at the end of this month Hit me up if you want to go